Monday 17 January 2011

This is how we do it!


Ahh so my exam is over and my mind is feeling a lot less fluffy. My housemates are back in and my onesie is on.


My Tesco delivery is hopefully on its way with loads of yummy vegetables and ice lollies in it.


I've lost my gym card. I hope I find it soon. I paid a lot for my membership and would like nothing more than to be able to sweat out some toxins and have a yoga sesh.


Getting back into the swing of excercise is probably the hardest bit of keeping fit. I always find if I haven't been for a while it takes mammouth will power to force myself to go.


I normally use techniques to trick myself into it.


Technique 1: Stand in the mirror in ugly underwear and kinda crouch over like a hunchback, resulting in rolls and a grimace. (this one is quite brutal but serves its purpose).


Technique 2: Get into gym clothes and watch America's next top model- sure fire way to feel obese.


Technique 3: Facebook stalk for thinspiration then find really horrid pictures of myself to compare with.


Teqnique 4: Open a textbook. Procrastination can be a positive.


Teqnique 5: Eat infront of the mirror. Preferably something messy so I dribble it all over my fleshy body.


( WARNING: Some of these technique may lead to depression, acts of self mutilation or enjoyment of messy food to the extent that you go back to the kitchen to get more, dodge the gym and draw faces on rolls to make light of a bad situation)



Anyway, despite having a sickness bug over Christmas I have somehow managed to become fairly portly and round. I say somehow, I know how it happened. I ate a lot of potato and a lot of dairylee dunkers followed by a fair amount of beer and marzipan...


I think the constant battle with ones self image is a normal one. If you never care about how you look that surely isn't all good? Surely it means you think quite little of yourself. I mean, don't get me wrong I hardly wear make-up but I do care about my size and figure.


To be over controlling is pretty bad too. people who have to perfect themselves are definately making up for something. Maybe a guilty consience or an insecurity they refuse to address?


But who am I to point the finger? I can't possibly know what goes on in other peoples minds. But I love to observe. I love to people watch. To see how people move and speak and act.


Someone said to me the other night that they admire how honest I am in this blog. Although I feel I am very honest about a lotta things, I'd like to think it's fairly ambiguous, that my honesty is not completely transparent.


I think it's good to be honest. I find it hard to be honest about my feelings in person because I'm scared of offending people or retaliation. Sometimes I wonder how my life would be if I didn't have the luxury of being able to write all my feelings down and send them into cyber space.

It's a tricky one because I've always written things down. Even when I was just a little'un. It's kinda my thing.I over analyse everything and I'm pretty sure I'd implode or become an absolute nutcase if I didn't have some sort of vent.


I'm feeling like this year might have some promise after all, despite a less than smooth start. It's my birthday on February the 2nd and I'm going to be saying goodbye to my teens and hello to adult-hood. I'm already worried about getting old wondering where time goes.


My pals are coming to visit from all over the place and I'm so excited to go out with them like we do at home. I am the token Welsh girl in uni and so my theme is Wales/Farmers.


I'm excited because I'm intrigued at how Ruby and Westie will manage to make something slutty out of Wales...sheep maybe?


I love my mix of friends but I've gotta be honest and say I'm mainly looking forward to having my pals from Cymru here to party. They know how to have a good night.


time to go


Jojo xxx


I wrote this listening to : Jack Johnson

Thursday 6 January 2011

New Years Hopes Resolutions and Aims.

1) Do better, work harder.
2) Don't be a pushover.
3) Be more positive.
4) Take more steps towards career.
5)If I'm struggling I must seek help and not suffer in silence.

There's not much more that can be said except that everyone has things they want to achieve and no one is perfect.
To strive to be perfect is a task not worth embarking on and to strive for perfection will make life harder than it should be.

I think the most you can do for yourself is to do what you love and to share yourself with world.

2010 has taught me in hindsight that you shouldn't give anyone the right to belittle you.

That a good heart goes a long way.

That it's okay to wish time away, as long as you have something to look forward to.

And that life changes everyone. Even the people you'd hoped would never be changed.

Thats all for now

Jojoxxx

I wrote this listening to : KOL