Kegging Strangers and Crab Dancing

I ventured out into the abyss that is Tenby on a Saturday night last night, with my compardre Becklesworth. I'd had such a shitty week in work and I just didn't want to leave my bed. BUT! I got my act together and got into the spirit of weekend celebration.

And I wasn't disappointed.

Sophisticated Intentions

The evening consisted of screaming laughter, moonwalking, stealing sunglasses (resulting in virtual blindness), jager bombs, press-ups and a LOT of crab dancing(darting back and for sideways, whilst making pincer shapes with hands - a new personal favourite).

I also managed to keg a complete stranger on my way to the loo.
I was on my own walking to the toilets to relieve myself, when my legs decided to cease to work completely.I felt myself falling so grabbed onto the closest thing around me, which turned out to be a man. Well, a man's trousers. As I fell I pulled on the trousers and brought them down with me as I sideways face-planted the sticky carpet.
Needless to say I soon realised that I had stripped a complete stranger down to his hairy bollocks in the middle of the Sands. He scrabbled to keep his boxers up whilst I got an up-the-skirt type view of his undercarriage. Having ventured off the dancefloor alone, I had no one to cry with laughter with about the whole debacle. I gave a short, awkward shout-laugh and got up and out of the way in record speed.

I scurried, un-gracefully, in through the front door at about half three and made the most perfect poached egg I've ever experienced. I also tried to eat it lying down in bed, resulting in a yolky, crusty mess of eyebrows this morning. Never mind, I tried.

Creepy Crabby

My entire body aches, I feel as though I've fought seven ninjas consecutively, whilst wearing ankle weights and chain mail.
I gagged, quite frankly, an embarrassing amount of times whilst brushing my teeth, and my bowels have been on a planet of their own, making me reminiscent of a victim of norovirus and swine-flu combined (sorry).


There were good men out last night - in that they weren't creeping all over the place on the whole.
Everyone seemed to be out to act like plebs and have a giggle with their pals, which resulted in a very pleasant evening for girls in relationships throughout the club.

There's nothing worse than a creep lurking around you with "come to bed eyes" resembling that of a mass murderer with a penchant for chloroform and clingfilm.

Although today was a write off (and my boyfriend may dump me on the basis that I've gone into details about my bowel movements on the internet), I had a bloody good night, and was reminded that Pembs has some true characters that you just can't find elsewhere.

Cheeeeers Beyyyyys.

That's all for now, Jojo xxx